People!

Inglourious Basterds! Go see it! It was seriously fantastic movie and even though I find Bradley Jolie-Pitt to be a bore and over-exposed, I loved his character. I pretty much loved every damned Basterd. The entire thing was pretty freaking brill.

It also made me miss my German language class. Is that weird?

Ok, I Need To Rant

*I wish people would stop being like “So, when’s the new book coming out? Are you writing another one? Why can’t you just sit down and write something?” or when I tell them to leave my ass alone because I am actually trying to get something accomplished, they’re all like “Oh, so you were just lying, you’re not really writing, you’re just sitting there looking at the computer!” For the fuck of shit, leave me alone! Writing does not equal continuous typing at the keyboard nor does it mean I can just sit down and bust something out on a whim. I wish I could, but I can’t. Sorry. I’d like to see you do any better.

*Thank you, you ancient crone of a doctor, I had no idea my ass has expanded since leaving the military. You know, cause my clothes not fitting anymore wasn’t a clue or anything. The more you remind me I’m a fatty fat fat, the more I shirk my exercise, just out of spite, you evil whore.

*I hate work and I don’t want to go back.

*Men need to stop dressing like overgrown frat boy douchebags.

*And is it just me, or is every woman on Mad Men really teeny tiny, with the obvious exception of Joan, who’s figure I envy?

Okay, sorry, I needed to get that out. Let me throw up some pics of my BFF and the best Bond girl eva!, Eva Green, who is more awesome than anyone I know. It’s been a while since I did that. I will then return to my hibernation.

She’s so fucking fierce.

Parting Is Such Sweet Sorrow

Okay, I’m not really parting. But I am going to be a lot more sporadic with my postings and whatnot. See, I have school starting up and I’m working on this novel thingy on top of working a full time job and keeping my house in a somewhat tidy manner. I’ll also be MIA sometimes from your wonderful corner of the interwebs. I’m really sorry, I am, but if I ever want to be able to leave my craptastic job, this is something I have to put my focus on. You understand, don’t ya?

Well, if I leave a pic of Stringer Bell, will you forgive me?
Dude has been popping up in almost every damn movie I’ve watched in the past couple of weeks. I’m not complaining, mind you, ’cause homeslice is foine. And, I still haven’t finished The Wire. I need to get on that

My Cat Is Teh Cuteness

She runs upstairs to “tell” on the neighbor’s cat every time he jumps onto my car to bask in the sun. Then she runs back downstairs with me in tow, “telling” me every few seconds to hurry my ass up so I can yell at the neighbor’s cat. At least, that’s what I believe she’s telling me.

My God, I have become one of those people; telling you all stories about my cat as if Molly were my kid. I won’t even go into how she’s so obnoxious every time I get on my computer and has to put her head right on my arm until I pet her so I can’t really get anything done.

My little rat

Kreativ Blogger Award

I received this from my new friend, Sadako. I had an entire thank you speech prepared, but I left it in my other pants. I hate when that happens.

The rules: Once you receive this award, you are to list seven of your favorite things and then nominate seven other blogs.

Let us begin, shall we?

1. My Quantum Leap DVD’s. They seriously bring me loads of joy. I only got my hands on them recently, and I’ve been loving watching episodes I haven’t seen since I was a pre-teen. And Al Calavicci makes my heart go pitter-pat.

2. Stephen King. The man is brilliant and is really the only writer capable of scaring the crap out of me. Examples: It, Bag of Bones (it was really more of a weirded out feeling with the ghosts and all), Pet Sematary. He’s also the only writer to make me break down into shameless, honking sobs not once, not twice, but three times in one book (The Green Mile…poor Del and Mr. Jingles. And John Coffey, but not spelled like the drink. He was scared of the dark!)

3. Raymond Chandler. I love everything about Raymond Chandler and the era of a time gone by he writes so fantastically about. Lady in the Lake was stupendous, and if you haven’t read it, I implore you to do so.

4. James Bond movies. They are the epitome of cool and make me want to be a spy so I can perhaps run into a super sexy British agent one day. I will not be able to sleep with him, however, because way too many of his “conquests” have ended up dead. And I don’t want to end up dead. I just want him to charm me and speak to me in a British accent.

5. Sharks. I’m terrified of them and fascinated by them at the same time. My real dream job (if this writer thing doesn’t work out) is to study them

6. Talking about how grouchy I’m going to be when I’m an old lady. Because I am going to be that old lady who sits on her porch and yells at the kids to get off her lawn while reminiscing about the good old days and how children had manners and respected their elders when I was young. I’m also going to be that lady who always has butterscotch candy in her pocket. And tissues tucked into the band of her watch.

7. History. Any kind of history, really, but my main passion has to deal with any and all wars, especially the American Civil War and World War Two. Don’t ask me why I’m so fascinated by wars. I don’t know. I know I just am. I’m fascinated by the dark side of man, I suppose.

And this year’s Kreativ Blogger nominees are: *drumroll*

1. Anners Louise Scribonia, Lover of Chandler- I’m nominating her for both of her brilliant blogs which can be read here and here.

2. Joders for her fantabulous work over here.

3. Mrs. M because she is all around brazilliant, as can be witnessed here.

4. Afers cause he makes me laugh. Check him out here

5. Shannon because she dares to delve in the insanity that is Sweet Valley High and she keeps me entertained here.

6. Mala because she is wonderful. Don’t believe me? You can read all about her here.

7. And finally the spectacular Girltalkread. She devotes her time to all sorts of YA fiction and I heart her for it. Check her out here.

If you were tagged, you know the rules. You can do it, or not.

Quantum Leap: Star-Crossed- Original Air Date March 31, 1989

Marion, Ohio
June 15, 1972

Sam has Leaped into Dr. Gerald Bryant, a professor at Lawrence College in Ohio (give it up for my home state). Dr. Bryant is the creepiest teacher on the campus whom all the gals adore because he teaches English Lit and busts out with lines from history’s greatest love stories.

He also happens to be banging one of his students, Jamie Lee. And he looks like Nick Nolte’s drunk mug shot. Jamie Lee is waaay too dramatic and is all about suicide pacts and forbidden love.

Sam is supposed to keep the Prof and Jamie Lee from a shotgun wedding, but Sam had spotted Donna Eleese, his own Juliet, walking on the campus of Lawrence, the Catholic college she attended, and he believes he’s here to give himself a second chance. Donna and Sam met when she was leaving the Star Bright Project, another project Sam worked on; it’s also where he first met Al. They were supposed to be married on the fifth of June, but she stood him up. Bitch. Al reminds him of Quantum Leap’s numero uno rule: The Time Traveler shall not take advantage of his position to improve or alter his life.

Anyway, Sam drops in on Donna at her workplace, the campus restaurant. Sam orders a burger and Donna somehow knows exactly how he wants it fixed. Sam believes it’s fate.

Oscar, Jamie Lee’s meathead boyfriend, sneaks up on Sam in the restaurant and wants to kick his ass. Sam convinces him Jamie Lee is so in love with him and she’s only using Bryant to get him jealous. Oscar tells him if he’s lying, he’s coming back to break his face. Typical jock.

Jamie Lee shows up at the Prof’s home, dressed as Guinevere, natch, later that night. She’s all disappointed he’s not dressed as Lancelot. Al’s all impressed with the Prof’s closet full of kinky sex stuff. Sam tries to convince Jamie Lee that Oscar’s the one for her. She reluctantly leaves after a totally dramatic exit. Chick needs to chill.

Sam tells Al how Donna knew how he wanted his cheeseburger earlier that afternoon. Sam begs Al to give him some specifics on Donna’s dad, since that’s the reason she failed to show at their wedding. Donna’s dad had abandoned her and she grew up to be suspicious of men. Al refuses, telling him Weitzman, the dude with an Abe Lincoln fixation who happens to lead the Committee that oversees the Project, wants Sam to be labeled as crazy so he can take over the Project completely. Al reminds Sam he’d broken plenty of rules last Leap, rules Sam had put into place, and he’s not going to risk his job any further. He tells him to start thinking with his big head and not the small one. Sam gives Al a wounded puppy look, but Al continues to resist.

The next morning, Sam drops in on Donna, who’s trying to figure out some crazy ass science calculation. Sam finishes it for her and she’s all like “Oh, duh. Of course I forgot Hubble’s Constant and the red shift.” Sam is seriously coming off as the creepy Prof here, sorry to say. Anyway, they get onto the discussion of time travel and Sam asks Donna where she would go back to if she had the chance. She answers she’d go back to when she was happiest; around six or seven. Sam bursts out with “Before your father left” and of course Donna gets all up in arms. She demands to know how he knew and tries to walk out. Sam tells her he was just going through her school records and noticed she hadn’t put a father down as next of kin. Yeah, creepy, Sam. Remember what you actually look like; a boozy Jon Voight. Let’s tone down the weirdness, shall we?

Sam tosses out he has a string theory he’d like to run by her as an attempt to keep her from running off. Donna tells him she has to go to the library and Sam counters with it’s a lovely public place. So, he can’t be Prof. Creepy McCreeperson there. Sam ends up telling her all about his string theory.

Al pops up after Donna leaves for work, dressed weird, even for Al. He’s also acting weird, even for Al. Sam deduces he’s not alone in the Imaging Chamber. Even guessing it’s Weitzman and the Committee. As Sam rambles on about how he wants to reunite Donna with her father so she might actually show up on their wedding day, Al begins to tell him about the six doctorates Sam holds, stressing one of them happens to be in ancient languages. Al happens to be wearing a sash imprinted with hieroglyphics. Sam is lost until Al points to the sash. They play Pictograph and Sam figures out Donna’s father is working in the Pentagon and is still in the Army. In the mean time, Ziggy has been scanning his side of the convo and has deduced Al is giving Sam information. Ziggy is such a rat. Al is dragged out of the Imaging Chamber, but not before yelling out “How could I write Col. Wojohowitz in hieroglyphics?!” Ha! Well played.

Sam asks Donna if she would be willing to travel to Washington D.C. with her. He even offers to bring along a chaperon, if it would make her more comfortable.

Sam calls Donna’s pop at his hotel and asks if he could see him. The Colonel tells him he’s leaving for Vietnam in the morning. Sam tells him it’s about Donna. He tells the Colonel how skipping out on her has left Donna a mess. The Colonel tells him the break-up between Donna’s mom and him had nothing to do with Donna and that he loves her. Sam tells him he should probably be telling that to Donna, not him. However, the Colonel refuses to “re-open old wounds”, especially before shipping out. Maybe he’ll get to it when (or if) he comes back.

Oscar shows up at the Prof’s and punches Sam right in the nose. Sam punches him back. It’s only fair. Sam’s advice obviously didn’t work. Sam asks Oscar if he has a car. He, of course, has a muscle car. Sam asks if it is large enough to hold him, Jamie Lee, Donna and Oscar. Time for a road trip! He’ll fix Jamie Lee and Oscar’s relationship and reunite Donna and her father; kill two birds with one stone. Of course, he isn’t going to tell Donna the nature of the trip.

At a rest stop, Al reappears. He tells Sam he had been fired after they fed the hieroglyphics into Ziggy. However, Al, begin a sneaky devil, set Weitzman up with Tina and then blackmailed him so he could get his job back. I loves it.

Back on the road, Sam finally tells Donna they’re on the way to see her father.

They finally show up at the hotel and try to get up to see the Colonel, but security won’t let them through because they can’t prove Donna is actually her father and the Colonel has a “do not disturb” on his line. Sam takes Donna around back and sneaks into the hotel, finding a door with a piece of tape over the latch. Sam reunites Donna with her pop. Back in the car, Jamie Lee and Oscar fall back into love. Thus, Sam’s job is done and he Leaps.

Brushes With History: The hotel Sam and Donna break into happens to be the Watergate and it happens to be the 17th of June. When the guard goes around back to check on the new car that appeared in visitor’s lot, and failed to leave when the guards turned away Sam and Donna, he notices the propped door and calls to report a break-in. This sets the ball in motion for the Watergate scandal and Nixon’s impeachment.

Next Week: The Secret of the Indian

I Don’t Like

being the ugliest person in my family

Ow! My Brain

It’s terrifying and mind-boggling to think there are people in this country who wanted This Woman (I will not say her name) to be VP of the United States. And my hatred of the Republican Party has only deepened since 2008. Why, you ask? Because if they wouldn’t have been so GD eager to grab the voters who only wanted Hillary to become President because she was a woman, they would have never picked That Woman to run alongside McCain, thus we would never have to hear any of the batshit crazy rhetoric spewed from her gob on a daily basis. Because she would still be considered nothing more than the Governor of Alaska which houses roughly 34.8 people.

Death Panels? Seriously? Are you fucking high? Can you not comprehend plain English? Or do you do what Crazy Lady at my work does? Listens to Rush Limbaugh and just mimic him like a little parrot, not truly understanding what the hell you’re talking about? Buy a fucking clue.

Also, explain to me what is wrong with President Obama. Can anyone do that? All I get is “ZOMG, he’s an evil SOCIALIST and we’re all going to be COMMIES and he’s not even an REAL AMERICAN! SHOW ME THE BIRF CERTIFICATE!!!!11!!1″. Yeah, he’s not a socialist, we’re not going to be commies, and homeboy was born in Hawaii. Ruh-tarded People of America, you all need to buy a clue, too.

P.S. I will de-friend a bitch on Facebook like that *finger snap* for ignorant ass comments about the President they can’t verify or back up. All I’m asking for is some intelligent debating. Seems that’s a skill that has fallen to the wayside. Shame.

I’m sorry for this post. I’m all angry from work last night and all I want to do is settle in to watch some Quantum Leap (I’m gonna watch the one where he Leaped into that hottie rain marker) take a half dozen sleeping pills and snooze until it’s time to wake up around 7 tonight.

Sweet Valley University # 1- College Girls

This is gonna be a speed post, mainly because I don’t have the energy to read the entire book again. Can you believe page 91-92 is ripped out? Who rips pages out of a book? That’s just rude and unnecessary.

The twins are in college. Good for them. Jessica has every dude falling to her feet. Good for her. Elizabeth gains the Freshman 15, balloons up to the ginormous size 8 and feels like a beluga whale. Not so good for her.

Todd wants to get it on like normal college kids. Liz doesn’t. They’re dunzo.

Enid has changed dramatically in the summer after senior year. Liz can’t understand why she’s such a snotty biatch because she’s not the annoying Wakefield twin. She’s the twin everybody loves. She seriously thinks that. I laugh. Then cry. Because I used to believe that.

Winston Egbert gets assigned the female dorms because they register him as Winnie. Hijinks will ensue, I’m sure.

Jessica wants to bone Mike McAllery. He’s mysterious and and an all around bad boy. He toys with her. Jessica gets frustrated. She will conquer Mikey because her milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, she believes.

WTF is History 101.8? Is it better than History 101 but not nearly as good as History 102? Why is there a .8 after the 101? Why is that one of Jessica’s classes? And why do I need to know?

Todd is on the prowl for cougars. ‘Cause he wants to get laid. He’s a horny little bastard which is quite a turn from the stoic, asexual Todd of yesteryear. I always assumed he looked like a Ken doll beneath his clothing.

Liz is roomies with some chick named Celine who is a bitch. I like her because Liz hates her. But she loses cool points when she macks it up with Todd. Todd is a douchnozzle.

There’s some story about a psychic who predicts some psychopath is going to kill some hot young blonde but I don’t really care too much about it to elaborate because neither Jessica nor Elizabeth is killed. Maybe next time.

During some party, Jessica goes off with some turd named Geoff who wants to get her nekkid. She’s also nearly abducted by a bunch of frat guys but her night in shining armor is some dude named Danny. She goes home but is attacked once again but someone who thinks she’s Elizabeth. OMG it’s the psycopath! Her new knight in shining armor is the hunka hunka burnin’ love known as Mike McAllery. They kiss and the end.

I’m gonna toss my previous list out the window and just going to focus on TV shows, since it’s sooooooo much easier to recap. I will be finishing up the Indian series, though, because they rock.

Next up: Quantum Leap: Star-Crossed starring a pre-Lois and Clark Teri Hatcher!

Photos

I’m too lazy to do any sort of review or any real post, so I thought I’d throw up pictures from our National Night Out this year. Enjoy.