So It Begins

I’ve started a new blog to record my exploits into the dieting world. If you want to follow leave me a comment here.

So, Ignore My Nonsensical Post Down Below

It comes from a sugar, sleep, and nourishment deprived mind.

I have to write this re-re entry paper on why I have chosen law as my professional career path. I have yet to figure out a way to say “I want to become a lawyer so I can one day take down my corrupt, re-re police department” in a professional way. What I want to say is “Napoleon is a bitchface hobag who deserves to suffer within the bowels of hell for all of eternity because he is a hypocritical, psychotic, tiny man. He is the reason I want to be a lawyer(even though I have geared my courses toward science for the past year or so but I am retarded stupid in math so a degree in science is never going to be a realistic goal anyway) because I want to rep all the normal officers for free every time they have a problem with Napoleon Bitchface. I want to make Napoleon my bitch and pee on his leg to show him who’s boss”. Of course, I cannot actually say that.

Blegh.

On a side note, I spent most of last night watching episodes of Law and Order:UK and I can honestly say I’m disappointed. It’s dumbed down and the plots are a little far-fetched at times. I hope it gets better because I will never tire of giggling when the coppers try to play bad cop on some schlub and sound so very polite the entire time they do it. They really do. But, as I have said before, you can have a British accent and suddenly be the most charming, polite and attractive person in the world, no matter what you’re saying. At least, in my eyes you will be. And yes I am a stupid American.

And speaking of the Brits…

Yeah.

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Haha

My cat, the unsinkable Molly, has just had her first contact with pepper spray. Today, I got my ass beat for about eight hours and had my yearly contact with OC spray. Fun. So, I was still covered with it when I came home. She wouldn’t leave me alone (like fucking always) and got some of it in her eye. Her poor little eyeball has been red for hours. That’ll learn her.

Dude

What’s up with Steve from The Jerry Springer Show trying to make me send my gold through the mail in return for cash? Does he need money that badly? I thought he was still with the Chicago police department. Weird.

And why are there so many Girls Gone Wild commercials. Didn’t that douchebag go to jail or something?

Stand By

I’m having technical issues.

Phuck WordPress. And Comcast

I’m beginning to wonder if Comcast is upset with me for ranting about their 250GB internet cap. My internet’s been shoddy ever since. Bugger. It really sucks trying to type this shit from my phone. Fuck Comcast. I also might be going through internet withdrawal.

Don’t Judge

I cannot wait for Jersey Shore next season. And if they do not have the same crew back, just count me out.

If anyone cares, I’m totally Team JWoww and Snooki! Also, Sammi is a huge, melodramatic bytch and Ronnie is as queer as a three dollar bill.

So, Yeah

You know my neighbor, the one who’s psycho and waaaay off his rocker? Yeah, well he just said he dreams about killing people and he wants to do it. And this man is allowed to carry a gun for a living. Yeah. If I end up getting shot by this nutball, someone please sue the US Government for me. Thanks.

People!

It’s Kate Moss’ birfday today!

If I had more time, I’d throw up something spectacular for the rexy goddess (TM Anners) but this will have to do for now.

Happy 36th, Katers!

What!

There is a Law & Order: UK?! And that this dude is in it?

Why did NO ONE tell me this? Pirate Bay, here I come.